he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just invented taco cereal.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
