walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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