Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i came on her dog
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
