Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
