i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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