That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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