god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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