yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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