Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Randomize
