no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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