Are we in a gay sports bar?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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