What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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