In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
