3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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