Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
wow bdsm is so cute
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
