no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Randomize
