If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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