I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
