You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
