GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize