He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
