If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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