I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
She's not a foreskin expert like you
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
