So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
