i jhust puked up my retainher.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
