Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
