bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Randomize
