I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
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