I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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