I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
