how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
