I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
