Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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