Kiss
Puke
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i think i have two assholes
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
