Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
