ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
