One girl and one boy is just not enough.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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