im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
