...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
