I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize