Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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