worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
