No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Randomize
