Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
