It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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