I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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