You just made me feel so damn special
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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