The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
there is glitter all over my balls
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