And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
