Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize
