I heard we made out
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
