we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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